‘Charlotte’s arms and legs are so slender.’
Squeeze, squish.
As I kneaded Charlotte’s limbs, I couldn’t help but admire them once again.
I usually just look down at her from above, so I always thought of her as a tiny, chubby little thing.
But now that I’m actually touching her, I can really feel how unrealistically slender her limbs are.
And when I cautiously try stretching her, I realize just how incredibly flexible she is.
Unlike Julia, who stiffens up and winces in pain with even the slightest movement, Charlotte stretches as smoothly as clay.
At this level, she could have been amazing at ballet or something similar.
I still can’t understand how such explosive strength comes from such a thin and small body.
[The Evil God ‘Kali’ warns that our Dark Knight might break if you keep going like that and suggests you be gentler.]
It seems like Kali is getting pretty anxious from an outsider’s perspective, but…
Feeling Charlotte’s bones directly, all I can do is marvel at their sturdiness.
I’m completely certain that no matter how much force I use, I won’t be able to break them. That confidence allows me to increase the intensity of the massage a bit.
“Nh… Huuu… Mmmh…”
And yet, instead of groaning in pain, Charlotte just keeps letting out soft, sweet sighs.
She seems quite satisfied.
‘It’s like playing with a doll instead of a person.’
At this point, I’m starting to question if this is even a human body.
Isn’t this just a high-quality mannequin?
A mannequin that smells sweet, like milk.
For a moment, I was seriously convinced of that—until Charlotte suddenly giggled.
“Wow, Mister, why are you so good at massages?”
“Hm?”
“I only used the coupon because I wanted to see you get flustered, but you’re way too good at this! I was actually shocked!”
“…”
So she finally admits it.
I knew it.
But more importantly, it seems like she’s not just satisfied with the massage—she absolutely loves it.
When customer satisfaction is this high, it only makes me want to work harder.
“Mister, are you a professional?”
“No. I’m not a professional, I just did a lot of image training.”
“Image training? You mean imagining it in your head? Can you really get this good just by doing that?”
“That depends on how strong your desire is.”
“Ah-ha…!”
In my case, I spend my entire day fantasizing about how to give Charlotte and Julia the best massages and stretching routines.
So it’s only natural that my image training would push me to near-professional levels.
Of course, I must have some talent for it as well.
“Hehe. I should’ve gotten one sooner. This feels soooo good… Mmm…”
“…”
Charlotte turns to look at Julia and Yuri, who had gone completely silent.
And then, as if making sure they could hear, she drags out the end of her sentence, savoring the sensation.
Even I could tell that she was being deliberately provoking.
I glance to the side, and—just as expected—I see Julia gritting her teeth while glaring at me.
The moment our eyes meet, she quickly turns her head away as if she hadn’t been paying attention.
But she can’t hide the way her cheeks have puffed up ever so slightly in frustration.
“Julia, do you want one too? Mister’s massage coupon.”
“N-no! Not at all! Not even a little bit!”
“Hmm…”
“W-wait… Did I accidentally say I was jealous out loud while zoning out?”
“No, you didn’t say anything like that.”
“Phew, thank—wait! I mean, not that it matters! I wasn’t jealous at all, and I don’t want one!”
And yet, despite her desperate denial, her body language says otherwise.
Seeing this, Charlotte smirks with a teasing, smug expression.
“Ohh? Is that so? If you wanted one, I was thinking of giving you a coupon.”
“…What?”
“But since you don’t want it, I won’t bother. Yay! I get to keep an extra coupon!”
“W-wait, Charlotte.”
“Hmm? What?”
“I-I never actually… said I didn’t want one…”
“…”
Pout. Pout.
Julia’s lips twitch as she slowly inches closer.
She’s pretending to be nonchalant, but her face is even redder than before, practically screaming that she’s dying of embarrassment.
“Hmm? So you do want one?”
“Ugh…”
“Haah. Julia. If you don’t say it properly, I won’t give it to you. You need at least a little courage.”
“Ugh…!”
She looks like a knight about to utter ‘I’d rather die!’ in battle.
After hesitating for a moment, she finally gathers her resolve and opens her mouth.
“I… I want one… Aslan’s massage coupon… If you give me one, I’d be really, really grateful…”
“Hehehe! That’s more like it! Alright! Here you go!”
“Ugh… Uuuugh…”
Swish.
Julia quickly grabs the coupon from Charlotte’s hand—
Then, without even looking back, she sprints away as fast as she can.
“Ack!”
Too embarrassed to even lift her head, Julia ran straight into a wall.
She let out a soft, whimpering “Uuugh…” as she rubbed her forehead, then quickly ran away again.
Charlotte, unable to hold back any longer, burst into laughter.
“Wasn’t that a bit too much? Julia finds it hard to say things like that in front of me.”
“That’s exactly why I made her say it. Otherwise, Julia would just keep her mouth shut forever, waiting for others to read her mind first—even if it takes a thousand years. She’d turn into an unbelievably frustrating person.”
“…”
Her reasoning was so logical and sound that I had no words to counter it.
She was right… A tsundere isn’t just someone who acts cold and distant.
Someone has to play the villain, forcing the dere side out, or else it never fully manifests.
Apparently, Charlotte had been playing that role all along.
Now that I think about it, Julia has been more honest lately compared to before.
I just never realized it was thanks to Charlotte.
“…Thanks.”
“Hehe! You’re welcome!”
Charlotte shrugged as if she already knew exactly what I was thanking her for, even without me saying it.
She usually acts slow-witted, but at times like this, she’s surprisingly sharp.
I reached out and patted Charlotte’s head.
Then, as a final touch, I gently kneaded her soft, mochi-like cheeks, finishing off the massage.
“Alright. That’s the end of it.”
“Okay! I’ll go check on Julia now—she’s probably buried under her blankets, kicking them in embarrassment!”
“…Yeah.”
With a bright smile, Charlotte dashed off in Julia’s direction—
Only to suddenly stop and turn back, as if she had forgotten something.
She made a small gesture, signaling for me to lower my head.
It seemed like she had something to say.
“Now that I think about it… Julia got all the good stuff today, so I’m gonna be a little greedy too… Eii!”
“…!?”
[The Evil God ‘Kali’ is so overwhelmed with emotion that they shed tears, claiming they could now die with no regrets!]
Charlotte suddenly threw her arms around my neck and—
Peck!
Her lips landed on my cheek with a soft, resounding kiss.
The sound echoed in the lounge.
Then, as if realizing what she had just done, Charlotte pulled back.
Her face, flushed and unusually bashful, was a rare sight.
“That was a thank-you for the massage!”
And with those words, she really ran off this time.
I stood frozen, absentmindedly touching the cheek where her warm, soft lips had just been.
The lingering sensation refused to fade.
‘…Is it even okay for someone to be this happy?’
A cheek kiss from Charlotte.
Even after it happened, I couldn’t fully process it.
Too many happy things were happening to me all at once.
At this rate, I was starting to feel anxious—like fate would balance it out by making me get run over by a carriage tomorrow.
A stupid grin crept onto my face, and I just couldn’t stop myself from chuckling.
Then, as I turned my head, I spotted someone I had momentarily forgotten about.
“Charlotte… My Charlotte…”
“Ah, damn!”
Yuri had collapsed onto the floor, mumbling those words in a dazed, lifeless voice.
For a second, I almost thought she was dead—her expression was that devastated.
So… Charlotte’s kiss had been a critical hit.
Yuri had taken the full impact and fallen into a near-death state.
We may not be close, but Yuri and I do share a certain understanding.
The kind of love we feel for Charlotte may be different, but we both cherish her deeply.
Because of that, I couldn’t help but feel a bit of sympathy for her.
“Pull yourself together, Yuri.”
“…Huh? Oh, Count… My apologies. I lost myself for a moment while on duty…”
“That’s not what I meant. Here. If you want it, take it.”
“Huh? No, no, it’s fine. I don’t need Count Aslan’s massage coupon… I stretch on my own, so I’m fine.”
“This isn’t my massage coupon. It’s Charlotte’s.”
“…!?”
The moment I held out the coupon, Yuri initially shook her head, refusing it.
But the second she heard Charlotte’s name, her eyes lit up.
She quickly grabbed the coupon and read the words on it over and over again, as if confirming its authenticity.
“Th-thank you, Count! I will never forget this favor!”
“It’s really not a big deal. Don’t think too much of it.”
“No! This is something that money can’t buy! This favor—I must repay it! Please, Count! Allow me to repay you someday!”
“Uh… Sure. Do whatever you want.”
Yuri’s burning, unwavering loyalty was a bit overwhelming, so I quickly sent her on her way.
Yuri really is a strange one.
Sometimes, I feel a sense of camaraderie with her…
But other times, she feels completely foreign.
Then again, maybe this level of insanity is exactly what it takes to be the protagonist of this crazy game of a life.
